Kaballat Shabbat behind the Mechitza and under the Moon

One of my friends suggested that we check out a synagogue in our neighborhood for Friday night services.  It was an orthodox congregation, with a mechitza (the divider between men and women's sides), but he said the services were spirited and fun, and I was curious to get a taste of a traditional service.

We arrived and split up, the men going in one entrance, and the women around the back.  We entered a room with a high mechitzah, separating the women's section from the men's.  The women were sitting silently as the men prayed.  This did not bode well.  Luckily, we soon realized that our male friends were not up front.  We were thrilled (or at least I was) to find that this was not the right service.  We went upstairs, and found another room with a mechitza.  This one ran down the middle, but the prayer leader was on the men's side.  It was hot, and there were no open seats.  I struggled to find our place in the siddur (prayerbook).  I was happy to see the women singing and praying audibly this time, but except for the times when I recognized a familiar tune, I was adrift.

Then, the unthinkable happened.  The lights went out.  Had someone leaned on the switch?  If so, we were stuck, because no one in that room was going to admit being willing to flip the switch back on after Shabbat had begun.  Since it was too dark to follow the siddur, many of the women walked outside, where there was still some light.  (The men stayed inside in the dark.  Go figure).

That's when the magic began for me.  The moon was bright and visible through the clouds, which were turning pink and drifting across the sky.  We could see a star peeking through here and there.  All around us were the sounds of people singing to welcome Shabbat.  It was wonderful to actually see evening fall.  Shabbat was arriving in a tangible, visible way.  Then the lights went back on, and many women went back inside.  I stayed outside for awhile though, not wanting to give up the breeze and the freedom.

All in all, the service was not my cup of tea.  But I'm glad I went, in part because it shows me just how far I have to go in being able to skillfully pray the traditional service.  I hope to go back at the end of the year and see if it feels different, or less foreign.

Next on my list is Shira Chadasha, and orthodox feminist congregation, which requires 10 women as well as 10 men to form a minyan, and which allows women to read Torah.  I hear the mechitza is lower, too. I'll be curious to see if that experience feels different, and less alienating.  Or whether it's like yoga, and the first 10 times are just going to seem awkward and uncomfortable no matter what.

Stay tuned!

Shabbat FAIL

So, it seems like we must be doing Shabbat wrong.  Because I'm sure that it's not supposed to be a day where you look at the clock wondering when it will end.  That's Yom Kippur!

Basically, the problems are:

(1) My school week is Sunday through Thursday, as is the girls'.

(2) All the stores close by 3 on Friday and don't open again till Sunday.

(3) Josh works Friday nights.

(4) We don't have a group of friends with kids yet for weekend playdates.

So I get home tired and sweaty from a field trip every Thursday night.  Friday (my only real day "off") is the day we run around (with the kids) doing shopping and errands so we can be sure to have food to last us till Sunday morning.  Friday afternoon, I hang with the kids while Josh works, and then sometimes sneak out to services.  Saturday morning, Viv and I go to services while Josh and Cass stay home.  Then we basically have 8 hours to fill till bedtime.  It's been crazy hot, so outdoor activities are hard with the kids during the day.  So unless we have a Shabbat lunch or something, we basically hang out annoying each other all day.  As soon as the kids are in bed, it's time to do my homework, since a brand new week starts at 8:30 AM Sunday.

I realize that the answer to this is planning.  We may soon get a long term car rental, since part of the problem is that by the time we realize we'd like to get out of town, we can no longer rent one.  And now that I'll no longer be required to attend services at HUC every Saturday, we will have a bit more freedom to get out of town.  But we're working so hard during the week that planning a trip seems like ONE MORE THING, and wouldn't necessarily leave us feeling more rested.  Shabbat just isn't feeling like a day of rest right now.  It feels like something to overcome, and that's not what I want.  I know we'll figure it out, and soon the girls will have friends who we can get together with on the weekends, which should help a lot.  But for now, the lack of Shabbat in my Shabbat is making me grouchy.

Kittens!

We've now moved out of Yemin Moshe, but this video shows a bit of how beautiful it is, and highlights our favorite part -- the KITTENS!